Q&A: Double Dilemma
When deciding for twins, take into consideration their personalities and feelings.
Question: My twins are entering first grade, and I am not sure if I should put them in the same class or request that they be placed separately. They have been together since birth; even in preschool they were in the same class.
Answer: Parents of twins will always face decisions that have to be made for two children at one time, and it’s important to think of both children equally before reaching an answer. One of the most difficult decisions is placing them together or finally putting them apart. There is really no clear-cut right or wrong answer, as every set of twins is different.
In preschool, twins normally start out together. When they move up to grade school and their personalities become more prominent, this is the time to think about keeping them together or not.
It’s OK to Keep Them Together Because…
- They will have a consistent educational experience with the same school work. They can help each other as they learn the same things at the same time.
- Twins that bring out the best in each other may bring out the best in their academic performances.
- Twins who have a healthy competition with each other can channel this into positive results.
- Twins who are fairly matched in terms of personality have a good sense of themselves and feel fairly confident in doing their own thing even when they are together.
It’s OK to Separate Them Because…
- For competitive twins, being together will make them feel that they need to outdo the other in all aspects. This rivalry will not be healthy for either of them.
- Twins that distract each other will have a hard time concentrating while in class. This may even distract the entire class.
- Twins who are dependent on each other need to learn to be on their own. More so, having one twin who is more dominant will prevent the submissive twin from shinning on his own.
- Twins have a natural bond with each other; separating them will force them to develop new friendships.
- Learning styles and the academic level of each twin may be different. Together they will tend to compare notes which will lead to insecurity of the one who is lagging behind. The teaching style of the teacher should match the learning style of each child.
Ultimately, the final decision should be based on your children, taking into consideration their personalities and feelings. Most importantly, get them involved since they will be the ones benefiting from this decision and you only want the best for both of them.